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I've got your back.

Bring your sense of humour and let's see what you're vibing.

After all, not everyone wants to jump straight in the deep end.

The Floater

 

$22

You came here intrigued as to what's under the surface, but now you're wondering if I'm making a bog of myself with toilet humour..

Calm your farm. These are swimming related metaphors guys.

You identify as the floater if you just kind of want to lay back on your floatie and drift with the current. You don't do turbulent crashing waves and you sure as much don't want to get ze hair wet.

And so,

This reading offering is a great option for anyone who wants to keep it super light but directional without any obscure unexpected rip tides.

Includes a 3 card spread- personalised insight from Oracle/tarot with what you need to know now. It's brief and uplifting and no, it's not a pregnancy test or a cheating boyfriend detector.

Personalised reading emailed to you.

The Water Treader

 

$33

This is for you if you're in the thick of it, going round and round with those little egg beater legs while you're waiting until someone throws you a line or you can catch a big enough breath to swim to shore.

Perhaps you want to quit your job, realised your boyfriend picks his nose and eats it or you just can't tell which way's north.

I've got you.

This spread is enough to get clarity and refresh your outlook but not enough to go so deep you need a scuba license.

You come in a tad salty but will leave refreshingly invigorated.

General, or one question- you choose.

More popular than the (unflushed) floater but doesn't go as deep as the Diver if you know what I mean.

Tarot/Oracle.& crystal infused reading that I wrap up into an email for you, with photographs of your spread.

The Diver 

 

$77

You're really at the height of things so you think, f*ck it.. Straight into a deep dive. A plunge of awakening.

Let me hold your hand while we get to the bottom of those murky questions you'd like clarity on. (Don't worry, I won't literally hold your hand)

Analysis paralysis; your landlord just gave you notice right after your car blew up; you trod in dog shit; Karen said you could move in with her but you'd have to share a room with old Kaz-her IBS, her cat and her vision board. Cringe. And, to add insult to injury you'd rather lick doorknobs during a pandemic than date anyone on those retched dating apps. Heck, did someone say meltdown?

Come over here you hot mess and let's untangle some of that fishing net and get you outta the deep end in one piece.The surface is calling!

ALL the cards you need in the allocated.

60 minutes via phonecall- emailed if preferred.

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